Nico: In a totally non-Growing Pains, Facts of Life or One Day At a Time (DA, duh duh, da!) kind of way...

Shryke: [Exasperated]  -- of ONE MONTH OUT, which is typically THE place to be here at Fantasy Moguls if you need a modest chuckle, a vocabulary lesson or something to help you get to sleep.

Nico: HEY!

Shryke: It's PART TWO of this SPECIAL EDITION of ONE MONTH OUT. Hope you're enjoying the festivities.

Nico: And I'm Nico, by the way, ONE MONTH OUT's regular columnist.

Shryke: You eat plenty of grains, huh?

Nico: [Sigh] Once again, congratulations to Shryke, here, who puzzled out the identities of my all-time favorite 10 films, so earning an invitation to my enchanted, secret lair.

Shryke: Dude, speaking of which, it's no wonder you keep this place a secret. You really need to clean up, man. The place looks like a bomb hit it. With another bomb.

Nico: [Coughing] Yeah. Know what? Not the maid. Last time, we subjected Spider-Man 3 to our exhaustive tag-team analyis. Now we'll resume our conversation with a look at the second item on our docket: Lucky You (Warner Bros.), the latest venture from veteran director Curtis Hanson. Hanson's resume includes such diverse, critically praised fare as L.A. Confidential, Wonder Boys and 8 Mile; he's also responsible for more broadly drawn, even somewhat caricatured family-under-threat thrillers like The Hand That Rocks the Cradle and The River Wild.

Shryke: Mr. Hanson, who also helped pen Lucky You's screenplay, seems to have a real affinity for years ending in 7: the last script he co-authored -- with Mystic River scribe Brian Helgeland -- was for L.A. Confidential (1997), which won a Best Adapted Screenplay Oscar. Prior to that, his first real recognition came in 1987 when he brought Anne Holden's novel The Bedroom Window to the big screen. So, given his penchant for coming up 7s –-

Nico: Oooh. Nicely done, Daniel-san. I can feel The Force flow through you.

Shryke: -- Hanson probably has a real attachment to lucky numbers, not to mention, luck in general. To that end, he's crafted a film around and set it on the gambling world's biggest stage: the World Series of Poker in Las Vegas. Poker, no longer confined to basement and back-room games, is a very big deal in entertainment these days -- figuring in recent theatrical offerings Rounders, the Danny Ocean series and Casino Royale. It was only a matter of time before Hollywood came knocking and asked to drop by professional gambling's own Super Bowl.

Nico: If these guys are the Super Bowl, I got kicked off some Pee-Wee squad. After they beat me up, called me names and took all my money.

Shryke: Well, it was bound to happen, sooner or later. What I can't figure out about Lucky You, though, is that ... Eric Bana?! For Drew Barrymore?

Nico: Yeah. It's, like, when Ric Ocasek married Paulina Porizkova, or Princess Fiona went "ogre" the moon for Shrek.

Shryke: I don't know if I'd go that far, exactly, but I do see your point. From an acting and box-office draw standpoint, Bana's had precious few "banner" days ...

NICO'S EDITOR: [Groaning loudly]

Shryke: So, Nico, what are your thoughts? Is it possible that Hanson sees something in Eric Bana that I, frankly, can't?

Nico: It's pretty hard for me to say: Bana's something of a cypher for me. I mean, I really, really liked him in Troy –- I actually loved just about everything about that film -- but that's about the only time I can think of where I, a member of the audience, felt any sort of CONNECTION with him. Of course, he hasn't been in all that much yet; he's done, what, seven, eight films? Eric Bana clearly has some skills. Just look at Munich, for heaven's sake, or Black Hawk Down. His performances lead me to think he's deliberate, thoughtful, controlled, disciplined. But that might be part of his "problem," too -- there's precious little warmth, or personality, or even life, in any of his characterizations. He actually reminds me a quite a bit of Richard Gere and Dustin Hoffman: actors who have unquestionable skills, but who consistently manage to remind you, even in their very best roles, that they're PLAYING A PART, and failing to BECOME A CHARACTER. What say you, though, Shryke?

Shryke: Well, actually, I think you put that quite well, and it's actually a pretty astute observation. I'll take a slightly different tack: Eric Bana's just not MEMORABLE. At all. Munich, which you mentioned a moment ago, was a terrific film, and very well-acted. But if you were to talk to anyone who saw that film, say, a month ago, or more, and asked them, "Do you remember Munich?" "Oh, yeah, sure!" "Well, can you think of who was IN it?" They'd be far more apt to say, "Oh ... um ... the James Bond dude! And, and ... uhh ... Captain Barbossa," than tell you anything about Eric Bana, who, you know, is ony the STAR of the film. I have to disagree with you about Troy -- he didn't even stand out in that, it was Brad Pitt's baby from start to finish. And as far as Hulk goes, well, no one in their right mind would ever WANT to be remembered for that.

Nico: [Chuckle]  Sounds to me like Hulk is your Ghost Rider.

Shryke: I don't know if I'd dedicate my life to inventing and building a TARDIS, so I could track down every single screening and DVD of the film that ever is, was or will be, and use antimatter to annihilate all of them. Which is, I gather, about how you feel about Ghost Rider ...

Nico: [Thinking hard] 

Shryke: ... but I'm certainly no fan of the film (Hulk).

Nico: Mmm.

Shryke: You're still thinking about that, aren't you?

Nico: Huh? Oh, sorry. I think you actually just inspired me. It felt a little like hypoxia -- shortness of breath, rapid pulse, euphoria. What you just sketched out there, envisioning an actual, noble purpose for my life, is a pretty neat amalgam of two Douglas Adams concepts: Wowbagger the Infinitely Prolonged, who spent an inconveniently endless existence insulting every single living being in the Universe; and the inhabitants of Krikkit, who, upon realizing they weren't alone in the cosmos stared up, rapt and amazed, at the incomprehensibly beautiful, indescribably precious diversity of Creation and said: "Right. It'll have to go." [Musing] I wonder if I can Google "TARDIS schematics" ...

Shryke: [Shaking head]  That's ... great, Nico, very nice.

Nico: [Spying, then grabbing two rubber bands] Now, I need to get my hands on a liquid lunch. Um, do you happen to know where the nearest particle accelerator is? [Staring] Oh, right... the column. Well, look, here's the thing: I actually really like Eric Bana, despite the fact that he makes about as much of an impression as most highway billboards in his films. What vibes I do manage to get from him are good; they're just not terribly impactful.

Shryke: So, look, if Bana fails to impress this time around -- I mean, my God, he's playing Drew Barrymore's love interest; even Michael Vartan and Jimmy Fallon have managed to become modestly known box-office commodities doing that -- how many more opportunities is he going to get? I mean, the guy's like a Beta test for Lacuna, Inc.

Nico: [Laughing] Oh, very good!

Shryke: [Grinning] Liked that, huh? Well, he's going to get at least one more shot at progressing past the level of RAM; he's the male lead in Oscar hopeful The Other Boleyn Girl this Christmas, playing an actual famous person -- Henry the Eighth -- alongside perhaps the hottest early-to-mid-20s female acting duo on the planet, Scarlett Johansson and Natalie Portman. Hopefully, after that performance, he won't be known as "Oh, Yeah, That Dude from The Other Boleyn Girl."

Nico: I agree, he's got to make a big impression in that, or maybe he needs to go back to being a stand-up comedian. Or washing cars. Or getting hit by cars -- at least then his name might get in the paper. By the way, I think it's going to be real hard for Bana, like the actual Henry VIII, come to think of it, to not be overshadowed by Boleyn Girl's female stars, don't you agree?

Shryke: Darn, you beat me to it. So, look, getting back to it: Does Lucky You seem to you to be a romantic comedy, or a romantic drama, or something completely different?

Nico: Well, I think you just hit the nail on the head, there. What IS Lucky You? I think it's a drama, and potentially a pretty tough, harsh, wrenching one, at that. But Warner Bros. seems to want to position it as a straightforward romantic comedy. Now, that might not be a bad strategy at all, and it's sure to snag Lucky You a decent opening -- that way, it's all but guaranteed to be the second choice of a LOT of sellout-encountering Spider-Man 3 patrons. But setting audiences up for The Wedding Singer, and then giving 'em Leaving Las Vegas might really damage its long-term prospects. It's occurred to me, too, that Lucky You isn't the first film like this Drew Barrymore's been in. She's actually built a substantial fraction of her adult career on so-called "stealth dramas:" Boys on the Side, Mad Love, Home Fries, Riding in Cars with Boys. She's making thoughtful, surprising, challenging films, but is anyone really watching?

Shryke: I've been more or less smitten with her ever since Bad Girls, but I happen to think moviegoers tend to find Ms. Barrymore's very appearance in a film comforting, bordering on irresistible. For her audience, at least, she tends to make bad films watchable, middling films good, and good films great. I tend to agree with you -- she's one of the most exciting, unconventional, unpredictable actresses in the business today, and I find it very difficult to question her tastes in pretty much anything ... save, perhaps, her taste in men. Tom Green, anyone? One things for certain, she's got a larger fan base than Eric Bana.

Nico: Eric Bana has a fan base?

Shryke: Hey, and let's not forget, either, that Robert Duvall's in Lucky You also. He's not doing very many films anymore, and it's a real treat to get to see him when we do. He's one of the screen's precious few actors who simply ... does ... not ... fail ... to turn in great performances.

MILLIONS OF MOVIEGOERS EVERYWHERE: [Remembering Duvall get outacted by furniture in The Sixth Day]

Shryke: There are a lot of folks out there who'll watch Duvall in anything, and I'm proud to be one of 'em.

MILLIONS OF MOVIEGOERS EVERYWHERE: [Now remembering him flap his flabby butt cheeks at John Travolta in Phenomenon]

Nico: Oh, I agree! Duvall's one of the most taken-for-granted actors working today (along with William H. Macy, Paul Giamatti, Brian Cox and Bruce McGill). Hell, I'll watch him in an Irish Spring commercial ... as long as I don't have to see him, you know, naked or anything.

Shryke: [Experiencing petit mal seizure] Dude! Seriously! Well, for those Duvall fans who want something else to salivate over, his next project is the NYC crime drama We Own the Night, which will team him up with perennial Oscar nominees Joaquin Phoenix and Mark Wahlberg.

Nico: One small bump in that Night -- it also costars Eva Mendes (Hitch, Ghost Rider), who, in this intrepid correspondent's opinion, has about as much personality and appeal as a colostomy bag, no matter how physically gorgeous she is. [Ignoring slack-jawed look from Shryke] Hey, speaking of Duvall and his reliably outstanding resume -- not to mention, wandering WAY the hell off the reservation, here -- what did you think of Open Range? I think Duvall should finish his career doing nothing but Westerns.

Shryke: Open Range was okay, except ... remember how hot Annette Benning used to be? Dude, in that movie, it looks like she drank a whole gallon of old!

Nico: [L'ing his FAO] Well, look... I wouldn't say she fell out of the ugly tree, but I do have some idea of what you mean. Of course, even in The Grifters, she looked like she'd been around the block more times than the ice cream truck. And, let's face it, she's not that much younger than her Grifters costar, Anjelica Huston ... who herself is, like, three days older than dirt. Annette Benning's like Rene Russo or Cybill Shepherd -- proving that you can still be sexy, even after Depends and hip replacement surgery. [Laughing] Damn. We ARE a tough crowd!

Shryke: So, for those of you keeping score at home, here's where we're at: Lucky You's success or failure will pretty much depend on what moviegoers think will be their best alternative to Spider-Man 3. Now, they'll still have Fracture, In the Land of Women, The Invisible and Next to choose from; and, a week later, erm, 28 Weeks Later and Georgia Rule enter the fray. (A fray! Stand back, mendicant...) What are your predictions for Lucky You, Nico?

Nico: Well, to me the question is, will there be any real alternative to Lucky You? None of April 27's releases will have ANY staying power whatsoever, with the possible exception of Next, the latest self-inflicted shotgun blast to Nicholas Cage's career and reputation. Sure, there's Fracture and In the Land of Women (which sounds like a George Romero project, doesn't it, folks?), maybe, but nothing else even marginally appealing will be out there. AFTER May 4, only 28 Weeks Later and Georgia Rule (and, I suppose, Captivity -- though I suspect it will wind up getting pushed back to fall or winter) have any chance at all of getting in there on box-office sloppy seconds. So, then, given all that, I honestly don't see HOW Lucky You can possibly avoid being a $50 million film. I'll forecast a pair of Top 5 finishes for Lucky You; IMDb in the 6.5-7.0 range, a single week of meaningful PTA (2-3 points, no more); opening-weekend box office in the neigborhood of $19-$22 million, and total revenues at around $48-$53 million. Your deal.

Shryke: Well, Drew's latest film, Music and Lyrics, performed almost exactly that well in theaters: just shy of $50 million in receipts and an IMDb score of 6.6, although that film managed only a single Top 5 ranking and never factored as far as PTA went. I think Barrymore's proven bankability and Bana's relative anonymity will end up cancelling each other out; ditto for Lucky You's genre malleability and May 4's comparatively weak hand. So I'll "call" your estimates for Lucky You, right across the board.

Nico: Wow... I'd actually sort of forgotten what affirmation sounded like. Thanks, man!

Shryke: You're still not getting my Bud Light, Johnny.

Nico: Ingrate.

How will it all end? Which limited releases will Tweedledum and Tweedle, erm, dummer bestow their nearly meaningless approval upon? In how many other ways can they entertain themselves, annoy their editor and baffle the hell out of pretty much everyone else? Find out VERY SOON in the CONCLUDING (yes! really!) installment of this SPECIAL EDITION of ONE MONTH OUT!

How soon is that? CLICK HERE to find out.

Nicodemus, our very own cinematic explorer and theatrical pioneer, is just like George Mallory, only marginally smellier than the would-be Everest-conqueror, who, after all, is well past his expiration date. And Shryke42 is, his not-so-long-suffering (but, really, long enough, as he'll attest to), poorly compensated filmic Sherpa. Want to join the expedition? Get in touch with their base camp at nicodemus@fantasymoguls.com.