While most women in North America (on planet Earth?) will be taking the queue to watch Carrie Bradshaw on the big screen, and many guys will be trying to catch a screening of Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull that they couldn't get into on opening weekend because all theaters were full, there will be three alternatives on the arthouse circuit. A 1960s drama, a horror film, and a dark comedy that already has a cult following.

When it opens on Wednesday, May 28, almost exactly a year will have passed since I first watched Savage Grace, one of the very few arthouse films available for next-to-nothing ($3) in May-July Ultimate Movie Moguls leagues. Because of the price, it's obviously one that Ultimate players need to seriously watch out for. I couldn't wait to lay my eyes on this one when it was shown in Paris a few days after its World Premiere at Cannes Film Festival's Director's Fortnight, in May 2007. With so many talents involved, Savage Grace looked like an alluring American indie, with a hot subject and a classy covering.

From the tone of my words (I was going to say "by the sound of voice," but ... well ... I'm the only one hearing my voice right now) you've probably already guessed that the final result was definitely not up to my expectations. The film, adapted from a book by Natalie Robins and Steven M.L. Aronson, is an intimate look inside the murky — perhaps the best word to describe it is simply "weird" — relationship between a mother and her son from the upper class, spread over more than 20 years, between the '50s and '70s in New York and mostly Europe. Unfortunately, instead of a fascinating moral examination, Savage Grace ends up being a potpourri of clichés that disturbs more in an embarassing than in a fascinating way.

Arthouse anticipation was, and could still be, high for a film with the names of filmmaker Tom Kalin, producer Christine Vachon and actress Julianne Moore on it. Kalin, who made a critically acclaimed festival darling of a first feature 15 years ago with Swoon, has spent the past few years producing a bit (I Shot Andy Warhol) and directing many shorts. Vachon, who was an assistant director on Swoon, has become one of the most daring producers in American arthouse cinema, most of the time being associated with Todd Haynes's work (but also working with Todd Solondz, Rose Troche, John Cameron Mitchell, Kimberly Peirce, etc.). And Moore is probably THE star of American independent cinema, thanks to directors like Haynes of course, and P.T. Anderson, Robert Altman and the Coens.

Now considering such pedigree, it seems obvious one should not settle his views on this film just by listening to my opinion as a film buff. I could be wrong and Savage Grace could become a critical hit, allowing the film to pack the very few theaters (two probably) that will play it on opening weekend. Plus the film went to Cannes, Karlovy Vary, London, Toronto, Sundance and, more recently, Tribeca, so festival programmers clearly like it. My guess, however, is that most critics won't, and will only see its soft glimpse of a red hot subject and wonder what Savage Grace would have been if Todd Haynes, for example, had tackled it.

Yet when it will be time to bet or not on this film for Fantasy Moguls purposes ... well, it is so cheap ($3), the talent involved is so respected, and the subject matter is so full of taboos, that it's certainly possible the film might collect a couple of PTA points. That, with an almost assured 6.0 User Rating (the current rating, with more than 600 votes), makes it a fair choice in Ultimate leagues (it won't cash in more than a few hundred thousands bucks, so save your money in Box Office Moguls leagues).

When you ask the common cinephile who are the masters of horror/sci-fi cinema, you will hear the names Sam Raimi, John Carpenter, Wes Craven, Peter Jackson. If you ask the specialist cinephiles, however, the ones who only like genre movies, the name Stuart Gordon will probably be thrown in the mix, and not in a shameful position. And people who know about Gordon are probably eagerly awaiting May 30, when Stuck, the new film by this master of horror, will be released by ThinkFilm. Gordon, whose last feature film was quite outside the bounds of his usual work (the David Mamet-scripted Edmond, starring William H. Macy), became a cult director thanks to the 1985 classic Re-Animator, his first of many H.P. Lovecraft adaptations (From Beyond, Castle Freak, Dagon). For the Christopher Lambert fans, yes, he is also the director of Fortress.

So Gordon is back, with a film that seems to reflect his capacity of mixing sinister stories with an undeniable touch of dark humour. Stuck follows a young nurse, portrayed by Mena Suvari, who commits a hit-and-run on a homeless man (Stephen Rea). Except that the man stays stuck, alive, in the windshield of the young woman's car. A strange pitch, and apparently based on a true story. Stuart Gordon, after a few years in the limbo of the horror genre, reminded people of his work by particpating on the "Masters of Horror" TV project, directing two episodes. He also proved himself a great judge of tastes last January by awarding Spanish horror sensation REC the Grand Prix at the Gerardmer Film Festival (he headed the jury). It's only natural, then, that the R-rated Stuck has an excellent reputation, having earned positive reviews, won a couple of prizes in festivals, and acquired a solid 7.8 User Rating on IMDb (although with less than 300 votes).

The main question, though, is this: In how many theaters will Stuck be released on opening weekend? If it opens in a hundred or so, à la Diary of the Dead, it clearly won't be worth having on your slate. If the number of theaters is absurdly low, however, it could grab a few PTA points to go along with its excellent UR. Enough to spend $8 in Ultimate leagues? Honestly, I'd say no.

And now, we come to what I personally think will be the great unknown of the summer (in my limited releases playground, that is). The Foot Fist Way. What a title. What a premise. What a long time for a film to finally be released. First things first: three film school pals, Jody Hill, Ben Best and Danny McBride, wrote the film together a few years ago, the story of a strip-mall tae kwon do instructor who finds out his wife is cheating on him and avenges himself on his young students, all while dreaming of meeting his hero, Chuck "The Truck" Williams. The friends cast themselves in the lead roles, and Jody Hill took the reins behind the camera. They shot the film in less than a month, in Hill's native North Carolina, with a few thousands dollars as a budget. Up until then, the men had only been working small jobs on a few David Gordon Green pictures.

The Foot Fist Way (wouldn't that have been a great title for a film with Chuck Norris?) was discreetly shown at Sundance in January ... 2006. It might have remained forever unreleased if Will Ferrell and Adam McKay, fresh off the success of Talladega Nights, had not caught a screening of the film and found it so funny that, according to Variety, they persuaded Paramount Vantage to acquire it. It then took a while to finally get it distributed, but, two years later, here it finally is, already displaying a cult status.

Even before being released, the film projected its director Jody Hill and its star Danny McBride into a whole new Hollywood dimension. Jody Hill has been hired to direct Seth Rogen in his mall security guard comedy Observe and Report, currently filming. McBride has already become a recognizable scene stealer in a few comedies (The Heartbreak Kid, Hot Rod, Drillbit Taylor) and seems on his way to doing so in a few more films (Tropic Thunder, The Pineapple Express, Land of the Lost). Moreover, the trio worked together again on a pilot for HBO, East Bound and Down.

But will amazing professional recognition translate in any way during the theatrical run of The Foot Fist Way? Can it become the sleeper comedy of the summer, packing theaters, slowly building buzz, and unexpectedly conquering the American box office? Or will Danny McBride's 'stache and Korean martial arts behavior remain unknown and be mostly ignored by audiences?

That's hard to predict ... the film clearly is a wild card, one that could go either way, crashing and burning or flying very high. With an $8 price tag in Ultimate leagues, the gamble is not cheap, but also not hugely risky. I'm personally tempted to give it a try and put it on a couple of my slates, because IF audiences click with The Foot Fist Way, it could grab much more than the 3 PTA points Fantasy Moguls predicts. And much more than $2.75 million at the ticket counter. Be careful, though, this one's an IF with capital letters. Maybe it's because I'm pretty sure that Way will not open anytime soon in Paris that I want to see it be successful. (Will Ferrell comedies are released in fewer theaters than Hungarian arthouse films in Paris, so I'm not optimistic about my own chances of seeing the film this summer.) Anyway, what would be the fun of Mogulation without taking some risks?

Here ends the month of May (for my columns anyway!). Next week, June will show its face with a quartet of arthouse films that will span from Italian giallo to Kazakh epic (completed by an American comedy and a British drama). And as you read those words, the Cannes Film Festival, vintage 2008, will have started, so basically, for the next 12 days, I will be spending my time reading everything there is to read about the films of Cannes in the papers, and watching all the Cannes glimpses broadcast on TV. And, of course, going to see the first films released after their Cannes premieres! Busy days ahead ...

P.S.: A big congratulation to my inimitable friend Shrykespeare on his one year columnist anniversary. Cheers, mon ami!

Indie Jones is relieved that The Foot Fist Way is not about kung fu, because if it was then there'd be two kung fu films (Foot Fist and Kung Fu Panda) coming out within a week of each other and that song about how "everybody was kung fu fighting" would be EVERYWHERE. Give him a friendly chop block at danceswiththearthouse@gmail.com.